I don't know what the hell I ate to cause this but last week I dropped the straightest, hard-as-a-rock dookie that any man has ever witnessed.
This billy club of a turd was no less than 10" and refused to wilt or break in half from just gravity alone so I knew there was going to be big trouble getting it to disappear.
I hesitantly tapped the lever because I was really strongly considering showing it to my wife like some sort of medal of manhood but I hit the lever with a little force anyway.
I stood in awe at the majesty of my man made giant tootsie roll as it just twirled around in the bowl, standing out of the water like a spoon will if you stir your coffee real fast and let go of the spoon.
All that I had accomplished was a poo smear at the bottom of the bowl and around the sides of the exit funnel although all the soiled toilet paper did go down.
If this had been a public restroom I would have left it there for the next occupant to marvel over but the house I was at belonged to a good friend of mine with a wife who was not real crazy about her husband's friends already....The deuce had to go.
All that was available was a frilly toilet brush in a really nice looking vase type container next to the toilet so naturally I poked at the poo a couple times with the handle end of the brush trying to break it in half...Success!
I wiped down the handle with some more toilet paper and put the brush back in the vase although I couldn't get all the poo out of the little hole in the end of the brush that one might use to hang the brush on a hook.
I walked out of that toilet with a new sense of pride that day!
