top ten reasons why soccer is stupid
10. It's not a legitimate sport if you're only asked to use half of your God-given limbs.
9. Hooligans (Why are they so intent on fighting and causing riots? Because there's nothing interesting happening on the field!)
8. Soccer strategy: "I'm running, I'm running, I kick the ball, I'm running, I'm running." (Repeat this over and over for an entire hour or more if necessary.)
7. There should be a certain drama in the final seconds of a sporting event, but that's pretty much ruined when you don't know exactly which those final seconds are! (I guess the refs are the only ones watching the game who know how much bonus time has been added due to penalty time. That's really lame.)
6. Color coded penalty cards.
5. France is good at it.
4. "Gooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaal" - Please, for the sake of humanity, I beg you to have a brain hemmorrage next time you make that call!
3. The ripping off of the shirt after the goal. Oh boy, I scored a goal, let's get naked! I betcha in all the gay bars tuned into the game, they're ripping their shirts off, too.
2. I really can't overstate this one enough: "France is good at it!"
1. In the past, they've actually had their world championship decided by penalty kicks!
10. It's not a legitimate sport if you're only asked to use half of your God-given limbs.
9. Hooligans (Why are they so intent on fighting and causing riots? Because there's nothing interesting happening on the field!)
8. Soccer strategy: "I'm running, I'm running, I kick the ball, I'm running, I'm running." (Repeat this over and over for an entire hour or more if necessary.)
7. There should be a certain drama in the final seconds of a sporting event, but that's pretty much ruined when you don't know exactly which those final seconds are! (I guess the refs are the only ones watching the game who know how much bonus time has been added due to penalty time. That's really lame.)
6. Color coded penalty cards.
5. France is good at it.
4. "Gooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaal" - Please, for the sake of humanity, I beg you to have a brain hemmorrage next time you make that call!
3. The ripping off of the shirt after the goal. Oh boy, I scored a goal, let's get naked! I betcha in all the gay bars tuned into the game, they're ripping their shirts off, too.
2. I really can't overstate this one enough: "France is good at it!"
1. In the past, they've actually had their world championship decided by penalty kicks!
