Funny stuff!

[RMKED]

Just got this in an email from my wife. This sounds just like our relationship...

Wife's Diary:

Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet
at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day
long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he
made no comment on it. Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we
go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much.

I asked him what was wrong. He said, 'Nothing.' I asked him if it was my
fault that he was upset. He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to
do with me, and not to worry about it. On the way home, I told him that I
loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving.

I can't explain his behavior I don't know why he didn't say, 'I love you,
too.' When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he
wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly, and
watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent. Finally, with silence
all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to
bed. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were
somewhere else. He fell asleep - I cried. I don't know what to do. I'm
almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a
disaster.


Husband's entry in his diary for the same evening:

Snowmobile wouldn't start, still can't figure it out.

 

[Lt Rascal]

HaHaHa SOOOOO True.

 

[1MEX]

X2 ^^^^^^ Bad sled = bad evenings

 

[Yamadoo04]

LOL I love it. I have to forward that one to my wife. Sounds exactly like some nights we have had.

 

[madsigntist]

LOL. Thats awesome. Will share that with the wife

 

[tudizzle]

another classic...


Dear Abby,
I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what could be a crucial decision.

I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs...phone rings, but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently, although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them."

I sometimes stay awake to look out for her cab coming home, but she always comes walking up the drive as I hear the sound of a car leaving, around the corner, as if she has gotten out and walked the rest of the way. Why? Maybe she wasn't in a taxi at all?

I once picked up her cell phone, just to see what time it was. This caused her to go completely berserk. She quickly snatched the phone out of my hand and cursed me hysterically, screaming that I should never touch her personal property, then accused me of trying to spy on her.

Anyway, I have never broached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her. I decided I was going to park my Harley Davidson Lowrider next to the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good view of the street around the corner when she came home. It was at that moment, crouching behind my motorcycle that I noticed a small amount of motor oil leaking through the gasket between the rear head and rocker arm cover.

So...is this something I can easily repair myself or do you think I should take it back to the dealer?

 

[RMKED]

Thats a gooder Dizz!

Here is another;

This guy is sitting at home alone when he hears a knock on the front door.There are two sheriff's deputies there. He asks if there is a problem. One of the deputies asks if he is married, and if so, can he see a picture of his wife.The guy says "sure" and shows him a picture of his wife. The sheriff says, "I'm sorry sir, but it looks like your wife's been hit by a truck."

The guy says, " I know, but she has a great personality and is an excellent cook. "

 

[harrysmith500]

I love dizzles!!!!

Eston, nice thread.

 

[JustinB]

eston I think that could be my problem. your first thred and my old ski-doo that is a nightly struggle.