I don't know if this has been here but:
For all you history buffs out there...
> >
> > History 101
> > For those that don't know about history .. Here is a condensed version:
> >
> > Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic
> > hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer
> > and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter..
> >
> > The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer
> > and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the
> > beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were
> > the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:
> >
> > 1. Liberals, and
> > 2. Conservatives.
> >
> > Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of
> > agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet,
> > so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be
> > invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were
> > formed.
> >
> > Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to B-B-Q at night
> > while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as
> > the Conservative movement.
> >
> > Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off
> > the conservatives by showing up for the nightly B-B-Q's and doing the
> > sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal
> > movement.
> >
> > Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became
> > known as girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the
> > domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the
> > concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer
> > that conservatives provided.
> >
> > Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most
> > powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by
> > the jackass.
> >
> > Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer
> > white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their
> > beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.
> > Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have
> > higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal
> > injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists
> > are liberals.. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it
> > wasn't fair to make the pitcher also bat.
> >
> > Conservatives drink domestic beer, mostly Bud. They eat red meat and still
> > provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo
> > cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors,
> > police officers, corporate executives, athletes, members of the military,
> > airline pilots and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives
> > who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.
> >
> > Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and
> > decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more
> > enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in
> > Europe when conservatives were coming to America . Liberals crept in after
> > the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for
> > nothing.
> >
> > Here ends today's lesson in world history:
> >
> > It should be noted that a Liberal may have a momentary urge to angrily
> > respond to the above before forwarding it.
> >
> > A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute truth
> > of this history that it will be forwarded immediately to other true
> > believers and to more liberals just to tick them off.
> >
> >
> >
> > And there you have it. Let your next action reveal your true self.
For all you history buffs out there...
> >
> > History 101
> > For those that don't know about history .. Here is a condensed version:
> >
> > Humans originally existed as members of small bands of nomadic
> > hunters/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer
> > and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in the winter..
> >
> > The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer
> > and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the
> > beer. These were the foundation of modern civilization and together were
> > the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:
> >
> > 1. Liberals, and
> > 2. Conservatives.
> >
> > Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of
> > agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet,
> > so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be
> > invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were
> > formed.
> >
> > Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to B-B-Q at night
> > while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as
> > the Conservative movement.
> >
> > Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off
> > the conservatives by showing up for the nightly B-B-Q's and doing the
> > sewing, fetching, and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal
> > movement.
> >
> > Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became
> > known as girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the
> > domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the
> > concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer
> > that conservatives provided.
> >
> > Over the years conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most
> > powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by
> > the jackass.
> >
> > Modern liberals like imported beer (with lime added), but most prefer
> > white wine or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their
> > beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare.
> > Another interesting evolutionary side note: most of their women have
> > higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal
> > injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists
> > are liberals.. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it
> > wasn't fair to make the pitcher also bat.
> >
> > Conservatives drink domestic beer, mostly Bud. They eat red meat and still
> > provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo
> > cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors,
> > police officers, corporate executives, athletes, members of the military,
> > airline pilots and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives
> > who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.
> >
> > Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and
> > decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more
> > enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in
> > Europe when conservatives were coming to America . Liberals crept in after
> > the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for
> > nothing.
> >
> > Here ends today's lesson in world history:
> >
> > It should be noted that a Liberal may have a momentary urge to angrily
> > respond to the above before forwarding it.
> >
> > A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute truth
> > of this history that it will be forwarded immediately to other true
> > believers and to more liberals just to tick them off.
> >
> >
> >
> > And there you have it. Let your next action reveal your true self.
