Drafting Guys Over 60
This is funny &
obviously written by a Former Soldier...
New Direction for
any war: Send Service Vets over 60!
I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists.
You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing a__-backwards.
Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You
shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.
For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds.
Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000
additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.
Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is
a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are
impatient and maybe letting us kill some a-hole that desperately deserves it will
make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.
An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always
get up early to pee, so what the hell.. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't
sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical guy.
If captured we couldn't
spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and
serial number would be a real brainteaser.
Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled
at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've
been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming
and yelling.
They could lighten
up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot
wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing
basic training.
Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen
anyone outrun a bullet.
An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave,
to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that
a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head, or that pants
are supposed to be around the hips, not the knees
These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more
about life before sending them off into harm's way.
Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing
an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off old farts with attitudes
and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them.
HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!! You think MEN
have attitudes??
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my G__!!!
If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!
This is funny &
obviously written by a Former Soldier...
New Direction for
any war: Send Service Vets over 60!
I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists.
You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing a__-backwards.
Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You
shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.
For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds.
Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000
additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.
Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is
a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are
impatient and maybe letting us kill some a-hole that desperately deserves it will
make us feel better and shut us up for awhile.
An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always
get up early to pee, so what the hell.. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't
sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical guy.
If captured we couldn't
spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and
serial number would be a real brainteaser.
Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled
at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've
been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming
and yelling.
They could lighten
up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot
wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing
basic training.
Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen
anyone outrun a bullet.
An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave,
to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that
a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head, or that pants
are supposed to be around the hips, not the knees
These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more
about life before sending them off into harm's way.
Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing
an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off old farts with attitudes
and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them.
HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50...in menopause!!! You think MEN
have attitudes??
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my G__!!!
If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!
