F
finnpacoutdoors
Member
Ralph the Hen
>
> Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his
> sleeping wife,
> and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly
> Gates, where St.
> Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ralph...
>
> Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be!
> I've got too much to live
> for. Send me back!'
>
> St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only
> one way you can go back, and
> that is as a chicken.'
>
> Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a
> farm near his
> home. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers,
> clucking, and
> pecking the ground. A rooster strolled past. 'So,
> you're the new hen, huh?
> How's your first day here?'
>
> 'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have
> this strange feeling inside.
> Like I'm gonna explode!'
>
> 'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster.
> 'Don't tell me you've never
> laid an egg before?'
>
> ' Never,' said Ralph. 'Well, just relax and let
> it happen,' says the
> rooster. 'It's no big deal.'
>
> Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out
> popped an egg!
>
> Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced
> motherhood. He soon laid
> another egg -- his joy was overwhelming.
>
> As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on
> the back of his
> head, and heard his wife yell.....
>
> 'Ralph! Wake up! You chit the bed!'
>
> Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his
> sleeping wife,
> and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly
> Gates, where St.
> Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ralph...
>
> Ralph was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be!
> I've got too much to live
> for. Send me back!'
>
> St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only
> one way you can go back, and
> that is as a chicken.'
>
> Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a
> farm near his
> home. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers,
> clucking, and
> pecking the ground. A rooster strolled past. 'So,
> you're the new hen, huh?
> How's your first day here?'
>
> 'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have
> this strange feeling inside.
> Like I'm gonna explode!'
>
> 'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster.
> 'Don't tell me you've never
> laid an egg before?'
>
> ' Never,' said Ralph. 'Well, just relax and let
> it happen,' says the
> rooster. 'It's no big deal.'
>
> Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out
> popped an egg!
>
> Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced
> motherhood. He soon laid
> another egg -- his joy was overwhelming.
>
> As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on
> the back of his
> head, and heard his wife yell.....
>
> 'Ralph! Wake up! You chit the bed!'
