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I'd have poured my drink on his crotch when no one was looking.....
Instructions for my funeral
1 Make box
2 put me in box
3 put box in hole
4 kick dirt on box
5 Pass a joint around and play "Ride On" By AC/DC
6 Ask anyone who is crying to leave
7 go home and let the worms do there work
You forgot to dig the hole.